We all start with a blank page and a blinking cursor. Maybe a prompt or two to get us going. Then the first letter drops forming the first word. For some of us, that first word is just that, a word. For others, the letters push words to form sentences, and we never look back.

There should be rules. Clear rules. Rules that are known and accepted.

It was probably the fourth day. Possibly the fifth. My alarm clock rang — as it did every day — at 6:30am. By alarm clock, I mean the special sunrise simulation clock that suggests you get out of bed via the metallic sounds of recorded birds and a blinding full spectrum light that pierces the thickest sleep. Buzzing, these days, was for olds.

A lot of blood and ink have been spilled around the events at (and following) Charlottesville. Rightly so, there has been a mass condemnation of racism and bigotry. Wrongly, there is a spattering — perhaps more than a spattering — of people stepping up in support of … statues.

It seems to me that one ought to rejoice in the fact of death — ought to decide, indeed, to earn one’s death by confronting with passion the conundrum of life. One is responsible for life: It is the small beacon in that terrifying darkness from which we come and to which we shall return. One must negotiate this passage as nobly as possible, for the sake of those who are coming after us” — James Baldwin

My sisters are nine and seven years younger than me. As a teen, I would sit and listen to their problems. I focused on how I could be helpful or what a potential solution was and when I could, I would, with all the years of worldly experience I had at 17, tell them exactly how to fix it.

I woke up this morning with a feeling of trepidation and sense of dread. Not sure why. Could be that it’s July 4th, and I know once the fireworks go off, my dog Taylor is going to freak out. Badly. Often when I feel this way, I get lost in my mind.

In 2008, I wrote a post declaring SEO is Dead. Nearly 10 years later, I still get nastygrams now and again, calling me evil and all kinds of stupid. Was I right? Did SEO die?

The article about Justin Caldbeck, an early stage VC who not only used his position of power (money) to harass women came out a few days ago. The horrible (no way he didn’t know he was doing wrong) advances he made weren’t that far off of Donald Trump’s “locker talk,” or when Jessica Livingston, co-founder of YC, was hit on by a VC.

Let’s start back a few years ago. Ok, maybe 15. I was at ServiceMagic (now HomeAdvisor) and was helping grow the company into the Home Services powerhouse it became (now part of IAC).

It seems every couple of years, I write this post. Right, Startup Yoda? At last count, in the past 10 years, I have spoken to just under 2,000 founders. At last count, in the past 10 years, I have spoken to 2 BILLION people that call themselves startup mentors. Or investors. Or something else that makes them feel good.

My favorite question when someone asks me to introduce them to someone I know is, “Why?” My favorite follow up question? “Why?”

I live on planes. You think I’m joking? We are in the 16th week of 2017, and I have been on 10 trips. Since I refuse to do work on planes (I spend too many hours already working), I get to catch up with (A LOT) of entertainment.

“That shit is awesome.”

“I have 20,000 twitter followers, and they love it.”

“Clearly people love us; we got 30,000 downloads in our first two weeks!”

“You are too early for me, but you will easily raise money.”

These are all lies. Damn lies.

I have been at Amazon for a couple of years now. Probably a couple of years longer than most (including me!) would imagine. But for someone who considers himself a member, and student, of the entrepreneurial landscape and ecosystem, there is no where else on the planet where I can see so many companies from the smallest startup to the largest enterprises up close.

It was probably the fourth day. Possibly the fifth.  My alarm clock rang as it did every day at 6:30am. By alarm clock I mean the special sunrise simulation clock that suggests you get out of bed via the metallic sounds of recorded birds and a blinding full spectrum light that pierces the thickest sleep.

Like many of my friends I woke up this morning in the surreal state of having no understanding of what happened the night before. I woke up with the feeling of a wail sitting at the back of your throat coupled with the fear that if you tried to speak all that would come out would be sobs.

I’ve never really been a political guy. I have voted for two presidents in my life time, and consider the act of voting something I only do when I deeply believe that a candidate will make the world around me better.

I still remember the moment I was standing with some friends, I must have been about 13, listening to them talk about women in a deeply sexual way and deciding that in order to fit in, I would do the same. I hated it.

This past weekend I did many things that normally make me very uncomfortable. I traveled. Internationally even. I was away from home for four days. I turned off my phone. I wore a suit.